Dear Tooth fairy,

I thought it would be fair to let you in on some intel I got from Bean while tucking her in tonight. As you know, she is 5 years, 10 months and 4 days old. She dreams of unicorns and beams with pride when she shows us her drawings of hearts, rainbows and happy families. She loves princesses, Star Wars and her new bike. All normal little girl stuff.

This morning, when she complained of a sore tooth, I discovered that it was loose. Her smile was bright and wide while she exclaimed that you were sure to come visit. But this evening, she is plotting ways to be sure and see your body and wings. I thought this was odd phrasing, so asked about it.

She remembers seeing you on The Rise of the Guardians and knows there are many fairies that go out to collect teeth. She said that she hopes the “really old one” comes… This is the fairy warning…. She said she hopes you die under her pillow, so she can see your whole body and wings. When I suggested that this wasn’t very nice, maybe we can wish for something nicer, she said that maybe one of the babies could get stuck under her pillow, so she can keep it in a box.

Fair warning, dear tooth fairy, my kid REALLY wants to see you with her own eyes. Tread lightly. I’ll cover for you.

Love, mom

P.S. A wise person once said the hardest part about parenting is not laughing at the wrong time. Touché.