I have been trying to encourage Bean to be a good sleeper for a while now. If she is with us (even just in the same room), she can go to sleep with relative ease. However, we have been in the habit of rocking her to sleep at night. Now, she won’t sleep on her own.
Don’t judge. It didn’t seem like a bad thing to hold and rock my sweet daughter. As it turns out – this is doing horrible things to our daughter (what those horrible things are, I wonder about now). Something about independence and self-reliance blah blah blah. So, we are trying to “sleep train”. This is one of those BS terms used to describe horrible chores parents must do. I say it is BS because we are now doing it.
What do I do when I get conflicting information from “the books” – I ask the doctor. He is the person who I use as my ultimate tie breaker. The doc says we are doing it wrong – so I will accept it.
What is sleep training? You ask… it is child abuse. Well – it is if you ask the Bean. What you do is you get her nice and tired, do the normal bed time routine, put her in bed, tuck her in and kiss her good night and leave.
Sounds easy, right.
What follows are the tears. The screaming. The pleading. The torture.
You are supposed to go in and make sure all is well at increasingly longer intervals of time until she has successfully fallen asleep. Again. This sound like it wouldn’t be that bad. But it is. She sounds SOOO very pitiful and it is breaking my heart. I started to wonder where “sleep training” (the happy little thing to encourage independence) crosses the line into child abuse. I am told by the books, doctor, other parents, etc. that it is harder on the parents than it is on the child… but neither hubby nor I were standing in bed SCREAMING as though our toes were being cut off one at a time.
We had our well baby appointment today. I confirmed that this screaming was normal and it was fine. He assured me that it would all get better. I will call him as a witness when we are jailed for child abuse.