— how to cut baby fingernails. I thought I knew before, but after cutting the Bean’s fingernails too close and cutting her (making her cry and then myself, out of guilt), I have learned to cut fingernails when the Bean is sleeping and not wiggling.

— Even a baby will smash her face with toys. Last night she smashed her face w/ her favorite toy, causing a little blood.

— Poop can get some distance. Even when blocked by a diaper.

— It is illegal to exterminate honey bees in the state of Virginia. (you can call someone to come get them, I will call them ‘honey bee ranchers’. I have a honey been rancher coming on Monday.)

— There is honey inside the house. (small amount on exterior wall)

— One can grow weary of moving books from one side of the house to the other, only to do it all again. Not just a few books, but hundreds, maybe thousands. Soon they will be gone.

— Clutter will drive you insane, given enough time.

— I learned why it is called the “Dr. Suess house”. Here are several links to “sources” for the rumor.

Local Real Estate “expert” — clearly not much of one in this case

Yahoo! Answers — mental note on the source quality here

Alas — someone who did some actual research. Maybe the “non-Jeffersonian” pit bulls are a bit much.

I kind of want to make a huge Grinch out of lights at Christmas.

This is why I call the house “Mount Crumpit” – since that is where the Grinch lived.

— You can go to the gym as a parent. It just has to be your own priority… and there are so many good reasons not to go. Like “I have to eat this brownie”

— It is not illegal (contrary to what the guy who signed me up for the gym says) to charge the same price for membership for the rest of time (i.e., if I sign up for $10 per month, then the rates go up, my rates don’t change unless I cancel and restart).

— It is a bad idea to host two different sets of guests at once. One set with many people is still fine.

— You do need AC when the temperature reaches 90 degrees. Just opening the windows does not stop it from being hot.

— There is more to learn than I anticipated, and these “What I’ve learned” entries will not stop any time soon.